i don't know how boys match. i think shoes & belt are the only thing. it doesn't matter. i just know if they look stupid.
Drunk and had dance off with 8 year old. Lost. Still drinking
I wish i had a shirt that said, "I know what you're thinking and it's not herpes on my face"
We're upstairs smoking....the password is pineapple
he kept his composure pretty well until he puked on the cop car
Just think, this time last Cinco de Mayo you were holding me up and finding me passed out in the yard of that house.
hey tell your friend im sorry for licking his mouth, that was probably inappropriate
The TA leading my study session just said "now get outta here. I need to get drunk before class"
i want to live in a society where a 20 year old can wear pigtails and not get them called handlebars, because i look fucking adorable in them.
Wait.....I ate a raw potato lastnight.
he told me he had a dream that he laid his head in my lap and silently gazed up at me. WHY AM I ALWAYS THE DUDE IN RELATIONSHIPS
Let us rub each other in fish scales and become mermaids
Should I go bust a nut on the beach
He asked if I was alright. I said "Yeah, I'm just an incapacitated ball of orgasmic bliss right now."
Not sure, she said after cussing out the dentist they called security. Make that the first person I know 86'ed by a dentist.
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