Do you ever think that bumblebee is the gay transformer?
Every day of my life.
My bracket is officially just a list of teams that lost.
i woke up with toilet paper straight tucked up in my underwear wearing a pizza sauce mustach. I dont think i got laid last night.
we cant have a funnel and a dog. thats a lot of responsibility
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She wasn't to happy when she went to put her shirt on and it was covered in cum I just looked at her and said collateral damage....
We simultaneously blacked out then simultaneously came to then simultaneously had sex with the neighbors. We're definitely meant to be roommates.
The bartender said he wanted to turn you gay, and we got free shots the rest of the night
Shes 18 and still has a curfew. it was great. didnt have to worry about her still being here in the morning.
..puke & rally mid art final. HAPPY CINCO DE MAYO!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I know it's like I wanna bring somebody fun who I haven't drunkenly expressed my feelings for. Or hooked up with. It's a struggle.
Apparently I was having great conversation with this 48 year old on grindr & he was concerned as to how I was getting home.
We got a noise complaint for vacuuming too much but not for getting really high and yelling about peanut butter
I literally can not watch Thor without thinking of your dick
I walked out and he was covered in jelly, slithering around the floor. I don't know how to process that.
My ex's psycho new girlfriend found my vibrator I forgot at his place. Apparently she didn't find it as funny as I did. 😂
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