I think i peed on brittanys purse
How can i ever say i miss u when u wont go away
For a day that started with shitting my pants, things turned out fairly well.
No that's sign language, not a drinking game. I tried to join
When he grabbed my tits it felt like he was either giving me a mammogram or trying to pierce my nipples with his fingers.
Well I let her practice her tattooing on me. This shaky dragon on my arm says Im getting laid.
Well tech shes born nov 12, but since her head was out on the 11th, she claims both days as her birthday
I was galloping around pretending to give birth to pbrs. I could have used a mask.
We shouldn't eat pizza in the pool
We r drinking tequila out a glass bottle and smoking weed underwater, pizzas the least of our concern
The last thing I remember is crying and shaking my head as she was putting salt on my hand. I guess I took the shot
And amler is totally snoring loud as fuck sitting on the steps with her feet in a puddle of soda puke
Someone is giving away free yogurt on craigslist. Can I get a ride?
When we were all out of beer you took a bite out of the cardboard beer box and said "close enough."
My cat just smacked my blunt from my hand and then put her head in my hand. I don't know how to feel
Campus scavenger hunt! and by scavenger hunt I mean all the pharmacies are sold out of Plan B.
Randomize
