and pubic hair rears its ugly head again
We decided to have a girls night of four lokos, three of us cried and the other puked
OH MY GOD. JESUS STRIPPER. THERE IS A JESUS STRIPPER HERE. A STRIPPER DRESSED AS JESUS.
he woke up with $200 in his pocket and had to buy his cell phone back from a hobo at the bus stop.
I left puerto rico a week ago and my vagina still smells like coconut.
we walked around the neighborhood with caution tape tied around our foreheads, making indian noises. I might have disturbed a crime scene to make a native american headdress.
is it weird that I didn't think he was hot last night when I was making out with him but right now I'm Facebook stalking him and think he's really attractive??
your beer goggles are on backwards.
You need to come back and help me drink our beer so the fridge has room for the other beers
I enjoy it and I rock at it. I wish there were a respectable way to make giving blow jobs a career.
Spring Fling is on 420. The theme better be 'Flower Child'.
I want there to be fog machines and unicorns.
It's Christmas, you should know what a virgin is.
The zombie version of you bit my friend's hand. No more zombie crawl for you. Not ever.
Not entirely sure how I got drunk off 2 mimosas but here I am
Turns out dignity is priceless and Plan B costs $41.09
My face is going numb. I think it's time I call it quits
Randomize
