Is it sad i was sitting here thinkin how i would only fuck Rob Pattinson if he was glittery at said time.
All he wants to do is masturbate while I sit there with my big toe up his ass that is not even the worst part of it.
Screw it. I'll show up in a white dress with a sign that says " I fucked the groom and it wasn't that great."
Watching tv. She's giving me head and she hates it when I watch her.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Hey got that picture this morning. 1. clean your room 2.what happened to your nail? and 3. your penis is amazing,.
I dont know if this is a good time to tell you but im actually a freshman.. not a senior
u r missing out we r watching a tranny direct traffic in a gstring
Just because you can put your penis in it does not make it "good stuff".
you walked in, put on rap music and started chugging vodka
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You called me your momma bear, and then demanded more vodka
I was planning out a scrapbook to memorialize my affair.......and that's when it hit me, I don't make good choices. On the upside, the scrap book came out great and I am glad I saved all the gate passes from the airport.
Santa tracker drinking game, you in or what?
Hey I’m obsessed with Charlie Heaton from stranger things...not because he got caught at the border with coke...okay that’s a lot of it
all I remember is them saying he had a big dick and the next thing I know I’m leaving with him
you have to get here a cop came into the bar and she looks like Sarah Palin. I think I'm gonna try and bang her
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