ur dog is so gonna tell on us one day.
for doing what?
for smoking bowls out on the deck while your parents aren't home.
I love how its suddenly "not all about sex" now that he can't get it up
Come over and help me clean up your so-called "winter wonderland" that you made with the fire extinguisher in the kitchen last night.
I have to be home in time to watch my friend on that Lifetime show about having babies. And by friend, I mean the girl I had a lesbian experience with at a party 3 years ago.
I don't remember much, but my night is dated pre-Jaeger and post-Jaeger. Also, my boss may or may not have tucked me in.
we've coined the Sunday morning ritual of taking out our puke-filled trash cans as The Trash Of Shame
no, she just came home, mumbled about being a gerbil out of water then ate half cooked chicken nuggets.. normal night
You yelled "I gave my neighbor some of my bitch sauce" and then passed out. You now have drinking limits with us.
He was pretty handsy. Told me I tasted like smoke. Good think he tasted that and not the stomach acid I just puked not ten minutes before.
I got with him in my watermelon costume so ya you owe me $1
I still have a little drunk in my system
Who's the naked guy asleep in your car?
I think that maybe Alyssa may of had too much to drink. is it normal for her to straddle random people in quizno's?
I got a lap dance in honor of your birthday last night.
Thank you.
theres a video...
oh god.
So, 'head before the store' turned into a fuck fest, & that's how I ended up at the grocery store smelling like a cum farm on Black Friday. How's your weekend?
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