Sex tip #67: Jizz in the eye is very near the equivalent to pepper spray. Not recommended for pleasure enhancement.
No, when he said that he wished he had my eyebrows, THATS when I knew he was gay.
Just saw a guy from Kansas and a guy from Nebraska arguing over who had less of an accent. God Bless the Midwest.
until you tell me otherwise ill assume we're playing "cavity search" the homeland security game to spice up our sex life
I have a question, if it paid really well, like ridiculously well, would you be a restaraunts under the table resident blowjob girl?
I totally just potholed and almost crashed while trying to lick salsa off my boob.
TONIGHT IS GOING TO BE A FUCKING BLAST. EVEN IF I HAVE TO SET OFF A BUNCH OF FIREWORKS IN YOUR KITCHEN.
He said I was doing well, so I stopped mid blow job to compliment his grammar. You could say I like intellectuals
I'm not sure... But I think I just found a porno I starred in during my black out week of '08.
i liked you for your lack of ambition and abundance of weed
My date bailed but I got to take a nap so I'm cool with it.
I just wanna inform you guys that the first pregnancy scare of 2016 is over...
I'm sitting in Madison square park surrounded by children thanking god I took emergency contraception
why the hell did we go to a rave last night?
we didn't?
definitely went to a bar with strobe lights
JENNIFER. You passed out in a toilet with a color changing light in it.
he went down on me and a few minutes later he asked to show me a magic trick. then he pulled a quarter out of my vagina
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