Mr ***** is in bed with his super hot wife giving her 18 inches of pleasure
I reminded them that I didn't puke and I cleaned yours up! So huh!
FUCK TREES I CLIMB BUOYS MOTHERFUCKER
STOP listening to that song
He ate me out. It was like watching him trying to win a pie eating contest
We are lost. Everyone is drunk and it all went downhill after we iced the bus driver.
there may or may not be knives in your bed. I would check
Update: it wasn't just our driver. This ticket confirms that the Royal Oak PD also found our behavior on the party bus to be "Lewd and Indecent."
i told the cop we knew everyone at the party, it was 250 of our closest friends and she's like funny nobody on the balcony knew whose house this was
Thats why they were on the balcony!
No one parties "Full Karen". She once broke a couple up at the bar, ate the girl out in the bathroom and took the guy home.
Ah. Hot spring. Infinitely less skeevy than a hot tub. These North Carolinian dudes are all class.
I think I just did my first walk of shame. He sent me home with a watermelon from his farm. Southern one night stands.
You can't talk like Dr. Evil to me five minutes after the greatest orgasm of my life.
Don't worry you weren't as drunk as you thought. You only fell 4 times.
Got baptized for New Years. In champagne and cheap vodka.
Turns out naked twister is less fun than it sounds. I can never look Lee in the eye again. But Aimee's boobs are glorious.
Randomize
