He started yelling "we're making a baby" mid thrust.. probably not the right guy for me right?
Woke up to sesame street reruns and a $62 pizza bill. Never again. I mean it this time.
Awkward interaction of the day: Staring at some guy trying out if he is or is not the guy that woke me up yesterday by getting arrested in front of my apartment.
I'd appreciated it if you didn't lick my boyfriends face again. I'm askin nicely. Thank you.
and honestly how many chances will you get to hook up with a one armed guy?
this cock blocking thing really has to end bro...its one thing to tell jen i live with my mom.. its another to cut the brakes on my car..
And then the lady sheeps would bring me the finest grass to eat cuz im the sheep king and id have sexy smooth sheep fur
Dude. I'm super jealous I'm not there. Plus I look really pretty tonight, I'm wearing my long blue dress, I have long blonde hair, and I'm just sitting here hitting Larry the Long Bong. I'll pretend like your 3 spirits are floating in my smoke. Fuck.
Topless dodge ball cldnt top that
Like not to be gross, he was eating me out while I was smoking a bowl. It was like a rap video
it's pizza time hurry your sexcapades
Serious question, on a scale of go for it to what the fuck are you thinking, what's me going to a monk or any religious official and saying "baptize me daddy" in a serious voice?
It finally happened my mom knowingly gave me money to buy drugs i knew this day would come\n
You need to get a passport so we can carry our bad decisions over the border
I'm so stoned. We're making Josh's sister bake us brownies. She's so small and pixie like. Her brownies make me cry tears of happy.
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