Me too. I'd like to spend all next summer high and drunk and riding ponies and boys.
WHY AM I ALWAYS THE GAY FRIEND?!?!
I was trying to climb into what I thought was a bunk bed.. Turns out it was just a cabinet under the sink in a bathroom
the only two hours i was sober on this trip and i managed to break my toe. no one will believe this.
Do u like your dick pics shot in hotdog or hamburger orientation?
On the plus side I'm getting really good at painting the inside of a toilet with my bowels.
Why aren't you two playing Dora the explorer with each other's genitals yet?
My whole house smells like Spaghetti-Os and cat litter. I think I've failed as an adult.
I can't feel the bottom half of my face but i feel like our sex would be amazing
You know you had a good time when you get the wheelchair treatment in Mexico back to your cruise.
I woke up with a dick pic from the ex-Mormon via email. Not really what I wanted to see before my first cup of coffee this morning, but I gotta say, I'm impressed.
How many ballsacks did you see last night because I saw eight
She picked me up from the bar in her underwear.
I give all credit to my lucky thong, there's never a time I haven't gotten laid while wearing it
why is half of my head shaved?
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