we are going to smoke at least three blunts before we go see Cloudy with a chance of meatballs. I'm going to have my mom make us spaghetti for when we get out so can your mom make those spicy meatballs? I thought I'd give you 9 days notice so everything's perfect.
LETS GET FUCKED UP IN ONESIES TONIGHT.
I worry about you sometimes...
I wish there was a non-hangover washing machine that I could stick myself in right now
I just saw some girl with the liscense plate "OBVIII"...I never wanted to get in a car accident so badly.
he's measuring my pool to see how much jello powder he needs. He got paid today.
she was literally 3 feet away from the garbage can, said she couldn't make it, and then proceeded to vomit on the floor in front of everyone in the restaurant
She insisted we fuck to Ludacris, not how I imagined popping her lesbian cherry would be. I tried delt and I liked it.
I would rather burn my vagina off with a damn flame thrower before I would touch anything that has touched her skank ass.
We should drive around in your Jeep on snow days and get stoned while we help random strangers stuck in the snow. So much good karma.
I'm turning twenty & the only honorable way to exit my teens is by slapping the fuck outta the bag. You better be in.
I mentioned your name at this party and some girl started crying.
You just referred to a pillow with a stolen bra strapped to it as "she". Let that sink in for a minute.
i was asked to be gay of honor by three different girls and NONE of the groomsmen at any of the weddings is open to experimenting. i mean whats the point then.
He's far too busy staring into my soul to touch my tits.
I'm crying during the second episode of Golden Girls that's how high I am.
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