Why don't you ever send me any naked pics
Hey. Did u tell any1 that I use Nuvaring?
Cuz 1 of ur bf's frat bros just asked me if I wanted to "play ring toss later"
did you know delaware is a STATE? HOLY CRAP! i didn't till i was hitting on this chick and asked her when she said she was from delaware, which state that was in. crazyness
he broke up with me while standing outside, half naked, waiting to fuck him. i feel like a leper right about now.
Someone changed my text signature to "Also, I think I might be gay" last night. Also, I think I might be gay
So I gave him a handjob and now we aren't friends anymore
You're at Notre Dame. What did you expect?
Oh so it was one of those "I shouldn't have gotten in a cab with a random 21 year old girl" kinda nights.
I cannot tell if the couch is cold or I spilled beer. THAT kind of night.
I thought it was a drawer and tried to pull it out and it wasnt a drawer it was the police call button. I hate everything.
I got punched in the face by a Cowboy last night. Then he bought me a beer cause o convinced security not to kick him out the bar. Start of a fairytale love story? I think so.
You said you were going to start drinking less. Drinking 25 small airplane bottle shots do not count.
STOP HOOKING UP WITH SOCCER MOMS! YOU ARE RUINING MY REPUTATION!
Fell off the toilet trying to reach to put my tampon in the garbage. Pride hurts real bad.
I just realized it's officially fall..I had sex while watching Halloween
What are you feeling right now?
Idk. I just flashed a porch 🤷🏼♀️
So not in the best place to do an emotional inventory
Randomize
