i just had a dream that i could control how black Will Smith was with a remote.i need to stop sleeping with the TV on
Just saw a group of asian tourists in safari outifts bow in thanks to the starbucks guys. And no Im not high.
you told him to eat candy out of your ear instead of your vagina because you had your period. never. drink. AGAIN.
It tastes like I coughed up blood....hello liver damage, I've been expecting you.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just downloaded the entire Justin Bieber album sober.. I think you know how I'm doing.
It seems like every guy I've hooked up with all end up hanging out together, its like a cult.
WHY ARE THERE NO BLACK EMOJIS? I CAN NEVER PROPERLY IDENTIFY MYSELF.
As my straight cousin I need you to answer a question. Are the Astros a baseball team, and if so, are they good? This is flirting related and time-sensitive.
Like you know your sex life is in a downward spiral when your best friend offers to sext you from Ireland
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Of all the things I've masturbated to while high, my favorites are ritz chips and trees
Quote from doctor, "that is a VERY angry vagina".
I'm fucked.
I actually haven't slept with anyone in a while. I think my whore phase is just seasonal.
I made a White Russian but saw how early it was and decided to substitute it for milk in my lucky charms. This is what it means to be an adult.
I just want to meet a nice normal guy that doesn't want me to taze him while we have sex. . . . .is that too much to ask for?
No just a list of 20 of my favorite things
Where are penises on the list
Where am I on the list
Under penises
Randomize