Tampa is so boring. I'm dying. I want lots of cleavage at my funeral. If i cant get laid, i want my friends to. I'm that kind of person
Dude, I found out the hard way that she wipes back to front. I ate her out and had to throw up.
So after your 27th or so beer, you gave me songs you want to have used if you're ever on intervention.
do you ever lay in the bath and watch the blood hit the water?
EWW. Don't discuss your period with me. You can go shave your back now.
At what point did I eat out of your mouth?
I just had to ask my dad for money to pay for my birth control. I've hit financial rock bottom.
You'd be surprised at how many crooked penises are out there
And I'm supposed to be surprised that you got another concussion?
open bar reception. dayglow. pray for me
hanging out with you guys is like living the wikipedia entry for drugs...not sure i can handle that tonight.
We need to play Chardee MacDennis. Contact me when you have an available date. This is not a question.
She did my hair, then ate me out. Switching teams was an awesome decision.
All I know is she walked in crying with a bag of limes and a bottle of tequila and has been locked in her room blasting lil wayne ever since.
I mean in all honesty I would let James Franco shit on my chest. End of story
We were fucking in the bedroom then we heard Sports center on in the living room. He stopped midfuck when I started celebrating that my team won over his
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