I have been thinking about it and I am really glad we decided to order helmets.
I shaved my pubes to make my cock look like it has a lions mane. to surprise the girl that works at the zoo when she comes over.
just came on the shower curtain. sorry housekeeping.
He was from Iceland of course I didnt sleep with him, havent you seen Mighty Ducks 2???
dipping my christmas cookies in kaluha. santa would be proud.
I got it! After our exam we take shots for every question we skipped!!!
I don't wanna die...
I just found out my boyfriend is cheating on me, please tell me Carl is a unisex name.
I'm doing it for my vagina. You should understand that
I wish pancakes were everywhere. Just pancakes. I want lilies at my wedding. No dress. Just priest. Just lilies.
I hear the sound of that stray bird you rescued from the kitchen but am too busy drunkenly masturbating to feed it
I saw a kid peeing outback so I yelled "you have a small pecker, but its ok cuz when life gives you lemons..." and proceeded to throw lemons at him
List 10 things your GF won't do for you, and we can work through that list.
We are gonna sacrifice to and pray to every god in this world that he doesn't find out about her sleeping with his old roommate.
I mean I made my therapist laugh so hard she cried....so yes, my life is literally a joke to everyone
You planned on giving him head in the shower?
More like I just fell and it seemed like a good idea when I was down there
Randomize
