He dyes his hair, fake tans and lies constantly. What did you really expect from him?
A better fuck for starters.
Do you ever creep on the girls you have banged and wondered how their walk of shame went?
after we finished he farted and said 'i've been holding that one in'
So I'm driving and this guy next to me at the stop light is reving his engine and honking at me. Motherfucker thinks that's because I'm asian and drive a honda I'm automatically going to race him
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
They just kept handing me shots and saying welcome to college
I hope there's a soldier with a Bedazzler just going to town right now.
the last call horn was blaring when I tried peeling you off the bathroom floor than you uttered "Ill take the toothless one.'
Please never let me the drunk fat dancer in the bus girl
You should photoshop their heads on tigers first!!
For my parents' annivery card? How high are you?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He burnt his arm on the grill, then turned around and started blaming it on the burger buns...I think it's safe to say he's drunk.
Se wrote an essay in class about proper and fashionable winter wear for dogs. Of course I regret fucking her.
I've been called an asshole for a lot of things in my life, but I never thought it would be because of potatoes
I did get to watch you pee, tho. That counts as another precious moment.
I found her face down on the kitchen floor asking anybody who walked by for Kraft Dinner
I told him you're making deviled eggs for the party. Sisters make deviled eggs to get their sisters laid. It's science.
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