Cool, I just put that together. I didn't know if using a tie-died sub machinegun was too crazy
You're the end to all my bad dreams.
Did you have that reoccuring dream about me banging your mom again?
I don't think cute and don't forget to get tested belong in the same text
i'm really high, and this is sooooooooooo important. how many frosties does it take to fill a bathtub?
it doesn't count as moral degradation if you win the strip off -right?
You don't even understand how penises react in the cold. I'm like a 8 year old boy right now.
Drunk on an escalator. I fell like 15 flights of stairs without actually moving more than 5 feet.
Woke up this morning on my couch at 6am fully dressed including heels, holding half a corn dog. I called you last night when I was buying the corn dog from a street vendor, I think.
I am in love with you.
I think there was chlamydia in those woods.
He pulled his pants down and said blow me, while passing out on my bed. I then pulled his pants up as he continuously started moaning in the background.
Oh please not the Easy Cheese again. That was weird.
They sleep with other people as long as there is no oral. Logic and reason were thrown out the window a long time ago with them.
They said you went back in for 30 minutes and were walking with your arms out like an eagle soaring
THIS THING HATES MY LIVER
I mean she's doing calculus in her head to prove how NOT drunk she is.
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