told my boyfriend i was a virgin so he wouldnt feel bad since he is. now hes asking why his dick is so itchy. should i tell him why?
i don't see why you should, it's not like you told the other guys with the itchy dicks.
I'm going to community service drunk, and I'm still going to be the most normal person there.
while fucking on the counter the whip cream was conveniently right next to us. i love thanksgiving
So one buddy got tackled at the urinals by national guard members and was arrested. Another had sex in a port o potty with possibly the drunkest girl I've ever encountered. The rest of us blacked out and won a few bets. So yes, the derby did meet our expectations.
Leaving the dealer's house. He just gave me a sincere hug and said good luck. This cant end well.
i understand why you think this is a bad idea but its happening so buckle up an get your whiskey
I woke up this morning next to a stack of saltines & a txt from u saying "do it." it took me a second to remember wat was going on
im sorry for trying to flush a roll of toilet paper down with my puke. probably not great for your toilet
Friends help friends remove their foot from the sunroof after an epic smoke sesh.
I'm at a bar. It's body paint Wednesday. All of the waitresses are topless. Help me
You're tall, so I have high hopes for your dick.
Got another job?
If by job you mean clever way of getting free tattoos, then yes. I got another job.
I asked him if we were going to get arrested for doing it in the bar parking lot. "Absolutly not" said the guy getting the blow job...
Curing hangovers with more alcohol was a great idea for the first five days
Now I’m honestly wondering if I took this kids virginity
Randomize
