The two bassists just totally made out. I NEED MENNA'S RIGHT now.
We've had the 'life would be so much better if we were both lesbians' conversation too much for that to be okay.
Is it obsessive that I keep picking my crazy sex rug burn scab so it leaves a scar I can remember him by?
She just referred to her vagina as "this bitch".
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Bad behavior is like a petri dish that grows organically In my heart
Getting drunk before noon on a Tuesday. When did this become my life? Did you know that a six-pack of Smirnoff is 2 liters?
If I walk in on you beating off, at least have the fucking decency to STOP BEATING OFF!
I just remember dedicating a shot to me giving you head so it was obviously a good night
Bless her heart. Her stupid, drunk, adderall-ed heart.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She made me walk a straight line to prove i was sober enough to help carry you to the car
Knowing you it was perfect out of spite. Like. A line straighter than YOU
He said "send me a motivational picture" so I sent one with mayo on my face that said "clearly I'm no stranger to white stuff on my face"...I'm the fuckingng worst
I just need a big sign that says no more penis please hanging over my head at all times
He lives in a tent in my ex'd backyard. Why the fuck would you want any of that dirty dick?
Just imagine a dick squawking like a parrot
But what is a man profited, if he should gain Joe Biden and lose Alex Trebek?
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