so while trying to be a healthier drunk i discovered that putting airborne in natty is not an advisable decision
Any particular reason you put 2 smashed up limes in my back pocket last night?
we need to drink 2009 down the drain
We were gonna play Truth or Dare but like 10 minutes in we decided to get naked and play Dare or Get the fuck out.
So my date night ended with us watching porn with his roommate.
All I remember is you introducing yourself to the entire basketball team using the line "I'll show you a slam dunk."
..But I'm still alive. And thats the main thing
Ladystoner tip: if eyes are bloodshot, lime green eyeliner makes them appear less red. its basic artt.
She didn't need to know her brother was thrown out of a bar for getting head on the dance floor. You're a shit head.
Well he's a 33 year old furniture salesman that picked up at 19 year old buying a bedroom set for her room. I can see how that would be awkward
I was apparently the best non-Irish person at the party. I wore my skating dress, Austrian flag and a giant shamrock. Everyone is calling me "30 Shots Girl".
This can only be settled by a dance off.
Sarah just give sum homeless dude a lap dance, took like 2$ worth of change from his cup and was all like, "Biiitch, this aint free"..
I swear we were drugged last night
We had a 130$ tab bitch. We drugged ourselves.
Your sister walked upto me in the middle of the hallway and was like get us beer or shes never having sex with you ever again, wtf
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