Richard, I just read on your Twitter account that you have enjoyed a, "Much needed post birthday smoothie..."...A bit revealing, no?
I think dad's getting high again. His last google search was "awesome ping pong shit."
Nothing like studying in the College of Communication to make you realize how smart you are.
This is worse than the time I broke into Subway to steal bread.
I knew I was high when I wanted to write a poem about how great it felt to wash my face
Her thighs are so strong. I thought my head was gonna get crushed when I was eating her out
we knew we'd be okay when we walked up to the dealers house and he asked us to please be quiet as to not wake his nana.
I was really excited when he said that condoms didn't fit him, then he added "they fall right off"...
My grandpa is giving me detailed instructions on how to fight a second floor bedroom fire from a ladder on the out side. Just in case
See this is why people shouldn't jump into marriage. See what type of drunk you're engaged to first.
Drunk yet?
Well I just did the worm on an empty dance floor while the bridesmaids were serving cake. You tell me.
He fucked me so well and hard that the couch slid into the Christmas tree. I had to pull branches out of my hair.
He can be a kind, caring soul but also give in to the temptation of eating unicorn ass.
Ya can’t just go throwing accusations around about someone pooping their pants without some hard evidence
My lack of taco bell is hindering me from seeing the good part of that situation
Randomize
