didnt we say no more talking to eachother
it will help you get over me i promise
im horny
ok i will unlock the door
one two three fourrrrnication!
I'm taking a dump and eating a fortune cookie and it said "Force it to be successful"
just smash crush and snort whatever we can get our paws on
I knew I fell for you for a reason
We're having a serious conversation and I just responded to something he said with an emoticon. I am so baked.
Tell me when you get here. I'm drinking beer in the bushes next to your house, and I put my hoodie up because I was cold. Pretty sure everyone lowkey thinks i'm homeless.
Just made a memo in my blackberry that contains seth's funeral arrangements. I have a feeling he has big plans for the weekend.
While he was gone for spring break I took his head board... I don't wanna wake up from his shenanigans for the rest of my college career.
do you ever wish you could like, jerk your heart off and be, like, emotionally satisfied? it'd feel like cuddling.
I asked you for a cigarette and you handed me your phone and told me to search for one
Hey, it's not my fault that you had a shitty bed frame that couldn't handle the rough sex you're into.
I slept like a rock because of your dick. I'll thank him personally later.
In other news, my ex fuck buddy is a surprisingly good wingman.
Fun fact: I came home from the riverboat without my panties. And woke up with a different pair on.
Just let a guy I just met eat me out in a shed at a baby shower. May have sunk to a brand new low
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