now were playing what girl doesnt belong in the picture of girls in bikinis.
I just got turned down by a drunk fat chick. At my own birthday party. God hates me.
Is there a technical name for reverse cowgirl? I'm trying to maintain a little dignity with my mother here
I'm so high I feel like I'm pedaling a bicycle but I'm laying on the couch. My body might be vibrating. I made soup.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She kept sniffing my sweater and tried to guess what type of detergent I use.
Maybe I'm a robot.
You can't be that drunk already
He threw up the X he took like 30min before then when we thought his antics were over... BOOM! He tried to pee out a light he was holding.
Our lady landlord called. Dot worry, I handled it. Drunk. Tell her it was Nate. Done. Good. Bye. Drunk.
i tried to break up pigeon sex because one looked too young to consent. fireball feminism ftw
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Not sure what happened last night, but I woke up without a shirt on and cereal glued to my boobs...
AND ONCE AGAIN, MY VAGINA HAS STRUCK AGAIN. HER PLANS TO TAKE OVER MARYLAND ARE WELL ON THEIR WAY AS SHE CONTINUES TO ENGULF EVERY QUEER IN A 10 MILE RADIUS
It's like the cookie assaulted me with being high.
Currently sifting through all the dick pics and nudes for a picture of my dad and I to post on social media for Father's Day...
I lost my wolf penis dildo in my garage. I should probably find it before I resume my garage sale tomorrow...
He just fucked me into paralysis. can't feel my hands or face.
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