i know ur right I'm sorry I'm stupid and incompitent look I can't even spell incompetent right! Fuck!
his facebook status quotes britney spears so there is always that
I have this strange craving to see a really fat person go down a slipnslide
There is only one good excuse for how sore I am right now. And that is incredibly acrobatic sex. Unfortunately for me that is not my excuse.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Last night was the twilight zone. We hungout with our 45 year old future selves and tried to fuck everything with a dick. Lets move forward from this.
Escorted out of jimmy johns because I refused to leave with my dog. Stole a loaf of bread on the way out.
I would totally lead with that as a line.'So, I was on Legends of the Hidden temple as a kid.. Your place or mine?'
Please hurry. I'm the only one here who's not an attorney with a trophy wife.
I just wanna get high and take a fucking awesome nap. Those are my goals for the week.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It was a blind-side dick pic.
it's like he didn't even know what a vagina was
Such a shame we didn't work out. We would've been a power couple producing NFL linemen :/
His mom wants to come see the dorm.
Hide the whip.
to be fair i didnt know she wanted to sleep with me
WHY THE FUCK ELSE WOULD SHE DRAG A STRAIGT MAN INTO A VICTORIA'S SECRET CHANGEROOM GODDAMMIT
she wouldnt leave because they were playing One Direction. I'm dating a thirteen year old.
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