Do you realize we just stole 12 dollars worth of quarters each from the office petty cash just to get manicures? New high or New Low?
Correct me if I'm wrong but the photo album titles "cause I've been drankin" and "baby jessica" should not belong to the same person.
So recap time do u remember biting that girls hand?
She tried to kill herself by taking a whole packet of panadol. I mean HELLO THAT'S ME EVERY SUNDAY MORNING.
dude I just got a noise complaint from my apartment people for loud sexual activities. I'm framing this for sure
I think my uterus is still laying in your bed somewhere under the covers.
threw up on my 7.30 AM placement test. Never again
I've come to the conclusion that Jesus and 2013 are haters.
Direct quote from her that tipped me off I was getting some: "I want to jump on his shoulders and wrap my legs around his face"
Stalker pic that shit
He left, I think he got uncomfortable when I started singing 'oompah oompah doodley do, I have a special riddle for you'
Does Jesus have blonde highlights? Pretty sure I saw him in a lavender shirt and Sperry's.
we received free cupcakes at the first bar, and then I at the second bar i hooked up with a fat chick from Cincinnati on the patio.
you win some, you lose some.
Everywhere I look there's another kitten this is so ideal
Can I live on acid? Kittens man. Kittens.
Jealous. I want an iud. Maybe there's a late night bodega that'll insert one for me
I'm pmsing pretty hard.. .just cried 3 times while eating a Hershey bar dipped in peanut butter
Randomize
