was it more than 30 minutes?
ya
then you're in a relationship
Kind of a slow process. Played 9 holes with her yesterday. Wish one of them was hers
The walk of shame is slightly more complicated when you wake up in the wrong country...
The one night I bring a girl home you leave the footloose soundtrack playing.
She walked into class late sat down for 5 min muttered 'oh i cant do this' and walked out. She looked like death.
We should party with her soon
Drinking wine in my childhood bed getting ready to go to sleep in order to wake up for my menial temp job. Thanks, college degree, I can handle the real world.
ya she's here .. it looks like she just gave up and passed out on the floor
We were laying in the basement dry humping to the rhythm of the washing machine
He's blaming gravity for his problems right now, so put that in perspective
Nothing quite like pre-gaming the Kentucky Derby with adderall and adderall. I'm fairly confident I could outrun all of these fucking horses in a foot race right now.
To be clear, the next time I wake up with your dick inside me, I will reach down and grab one and squeeze until it pops like a grape. You've been warned.
DON'T WEAR PANTS.
I REPEAT.
DO. NOT. WEAR. TROUSERS.
yeah im watching him make his speech now. cant take him seriously tho. hes talking about funding for education and all i can think about is how ive seen what he looks like wearing womens underwear...
You woke up butt naked, peed yourself said something about jumbo shrimp, and passed back out 10 seconds ltr..
Why are there 17 orders of shrimp lo mein in the bathtub?
Randomize
