Raise your hand if you bought 2 annoying girls shots of water. CLOWNS.
Braces and a neon one piece. She looks 15.
i'm in love
shes on the floor puking and texting simultaneously.
you just started pointing at the light and whispering "star wars"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
let me put this in terms we both understand. he was the crunchwrap supreme of men--the perfect combo of all things manly, gooey and delicious. and ready for instant enjoyment.
If I start taking birth control 8 days after we had sex do you think it'll stop the baby from being made?
Mattress luging...It's a long story.
Just a heads up, the coffee pot is filled with Jager.
Obama's speech on in 9 mins. Me in the shower now. Naked. Make your choice.
I'm bringing the tv in with me.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just used a beer funnel to put gas in my car
Best part of leaving the university? Interns are as hot as my former students, not legally off limits, and they will do anything for a full time job.
Oh god theyre drunkenly throwing knifes now, definitely the best movie I've worked on
I was trying to sext but got a notification that my dad and professor both commented on my Facebook photo. Bad timing.
So you're saying that I ended up challenging a dude to Uno then proceed to punch them in the face?
I've realized that my life is a cycle of high that is only broken by sobering up at work, which only happens because I can't smoke more
Randomize