I didn't think her British accent was real until I saw how fucked up her teeth were.
They just both started mumbling "i cant go home like this" "it's all over my face" "do you have extra pants?"
I feel uncockblockable...banged her in the bathroom with my iv still in
Everything tastes like hotdogs and shame.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
and if my full six pack comes in by Halloween there is no stopping the man slut costume. I have no shame
His ex-girlfriend just gave his current girlfriend the heimlach omg omg omg help this is so awkward
White girls? They're everywhere. In packs. Drunk white girl packs.
There's like a dolphin trainer convention here or something. I will parlay this trip to Vegas into riding Shamu if its the last thing I do.
I told you I missed you and you said you missed me as much as you miss a urinary tract infection. I get it. You're still mad.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just so you know.. If you ever cheat on me, i will cut your dick and fingers off and post them as my cover photo on Facebook. Love you.
I'm glad we can *facepalm* it together over the married couple we fucked separately.
Pooping with Eye of the Tiger playing. Not a single fuck shall be given.
What did you do with the dog when you went into the club?
coat checked
This toilet bowl is my home.
FINE. BE CELIBATE AND ACCUMULATE CATS. SEE IF I CARE.
Randomize