i nerd-gasmd. plain and simple.
I just figured it out. Meghan has the same smile as Sylvester Stallone.
he is so annoying
so stop sleeping with him
yeah but he is so hot when i'm drunk
Yo dude either Brian has herpes or he was jerking off to Web MD 'cause I just walked in on him
29 Petty People Reveal The Shallow Reasons They Turned Someone Down
im probably shirtless right now with a bottle of jack watching horton hears a who. this is a judgement free zone.
Are you seriously trying to guilt me into sending you naked pictures by saying "So I can look at them during dialysis" ?
Is it working?
He did the "not my house dance." Apparently it involves spreading cereal on the floor and then grinding into the carpet in bare feet while singing "not my house" over and over and dancing.
I just asked the bartender if I could get insurance on my drink in case I spilled it.
Nothing like a marijuana chart of usage in each country to make me understand math.
21 Horribly Evil Pranks To Play On Your Drunk Friends
Just saw a girl duct tape a cigarette back together..I feel like my life is shambles for being present for this
I'm two guys short from fucking the whole baseball team and one is gay. I will be successful by the end of this month.
I'm like 87% sure some random guy starting biting my ear after grinding me for like 30 seconds... I feel suprisingly unconcerned
Don't talk to me about scholarly dedication until you've taken a final in boxers, a bloody tank top and a zip tie to hold your hair back. I wear the most sullied 4.0 crown of all time....
He threw me over his shoulder and carried me outside, all the while drinking from the bottle of rum he was holding, while my ex watched. I'm winning the break-up.
It was like the icing on a beautiful fuck boy cake.