I don't know what you were told but i for sure didn't sleep with any one but steve's couch.
So we made editble underwear with fruit roll ups and fruit by the foot
Herpes is a lot like Arnold Schwartzenneger. Because it always comes back. Also, because it is usually in some way in control of California.
If I was on drugs, this would be amazing
Some guy stole lobsters by hiding them in his pants. We should strive to be like him.
I just realized that my phone was set to Brazilian time...what the fuck happened last night
Heard in class today that they replaced our carpet in last years apartment because they couldn't get the smell out, dude we smoked way to much pot last year.
putting weed in the twinkies box was possibly the best idea you've ever had
He turned down jacuzzi sex. He cares more about my vagina than i do.
just reminessing about the wedding and were they seriously to tight to serve a meal oorrrrrr was it just another one of my black-out-by-dinner drunks
the fact that you actualy have a 'black-out-by-dinner drunk' is a bit deserving..
You should try cooking mac & cheese naked sometime. It's quite relaxing.
Made a pan flute out of the varyingly empty beer bottles on the table. Played a glorious tune that paid tribute to the winds.
I AM VODKA MAN
The world is a different place when I'm actually having sex
the day has come. I have finally reached the point in my life where I just don't give a fuck about anything anymore. it's beautiful!
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