Midgets have it so easy. They have so much less leg area to shave.
don't leave me alone with all the disney princess sluts
dear sober me, don't br the first to open the fridge in the morning
you were watching the nanny crying, saying I wish I was that thin eating twinkies. THAT DRUNK.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
There is too much vodka and too much dick.
I swear to god he's a one man village people.
Need your help. He's locked himself in the bathroom with his bong and his childhood collection of Goosebumps books.
My penis just literally said "Yaaaaaay!!!" It's the first time it's spoken out loud. Before this we could only communicate through rudimentary sign language
I told him he wasn't aloud to one word text me. Unless that one word was threesome
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm scared to see what happens if we keep winning like this. I don't think there enough livers for every one after the season is over.
You'd think the neighbors would be used to grown men coming into my house drunk at 230 am.
When I'm drunk I really like to hold dicks. Like, affectionately.
Knowing there are different types of spiders in different countries and regions makes me never want to travel.
so he'll eat food out of a dumpster but he won't lick your ass?
You were lost on foot. Texted us and told us that N*Sync couldn't save you, and then you "met Jesus" in your car.
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