i just ate that cheese stick that was in my purse from last night.
come over i need a lifeguard for my shower
the last thing i remember saying is "hope you like body hair"
you fucked my boyfriend. margarita girls night will not fix this.
She had her underwear around her neck. No one can tell me i'm a slut now.
laying naked on couch sucking water through straw. i can still feel the orgasm from last night. thank you mdma.
It's ok, I may have just peed outside your car and used your whataburger napkins. Hope you weren't saving them for a special occasion.
Def just hooked up with my brother's senior prom date in his bed. Does that make me the worst brother ever?
At least I will not still be rolling when I pick up this animal. Thats a good development in five years
I never thought I would have to put a band-aid on my penis.
I need to wear something that says I would have sex with you but I'm not going to
My soul is telling me that I need to take this exam naked.
We're listening to drake in the middle of the woods and smoking two joints at once...my life is complete.
I mean, she's batshit insane and once choked a guy with one hand but she's still MILF material in my book.
I would like to reiterate that I went to give lessons and ended up having a three way instead
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