And mexicans. My burrito likes you.
I'm gunna smoke cigs today. I feel like I'm in that powerful and gritty mood which requires them
I said I wanted my dignity back. He brought my thong to me after sharpie-ing "dignity" on the front. I'm not sure if I should me mad or impressed.
just got invited to smoke a bowl by a guy who has a prostetic leg and has been on the jerry springer show multiple times. I love my life right now
If you ever find a dick that big chop it off and bring it to me.
Just ran four miles to popeye's. And back. Dedication.
I woke up with a bloody knee, 6 burn marks on my thigh and glitter nails If anyone asks I'm going to say You came into town
When you get home...find me in the shower. Only safe place at the moment.
It was a shot marathon. It only ended because we werent drinking in our house apparently we walked into the nieghbors. When they got home thy were soooooo pissed.
You gave him that scrunchie you made and called it your "sex offering".
He has a burner phone just to send dick pics. It's revolutionary
She has that type of face she reminds me of that weird girl from napoleon dynamite only taller and with hoop earrings.
i woke up in just my thong, face first on my bed with all the lights on. how hungover do you think i felt?
I went to steal condoms from your room and all I could find was chik fil a sauce
It was just like the old times. We watched movies and shit. But not like old times-i fucked her hot brother when she was in the shower? Times are a'changin.
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