Just be blunt and say drink from my dick
At one point during the moaning he reminded me of Forrest Gump
so when i dont talk to her she talks to herself...idk whats worse
We got them high and they had an hour long debate on the best way to get cum out of eyes.
you better fuck at least one or both of them.
I'm going to fuck my way out of the friend zone if its the last thing I do
She just did a bodyshot off herself. I don't care that it's only seven thirty, come pick her up.
I'm in his phone as "nashville blowjob" he also has "cleveland blowjob" "vegas blowjob" etc. i'm okay with this.
SOS. HE HAS PASSED OUT AND IS LYING ON TOP OF ME. HE IS STILL INSIDE. HELP
As long as I don't spend the half the week passed out/fucked up on Klonopin and no one dies, this will be the best week I've had all semester.
i officially have over $300 in my bank account. that's a year's worth of chipotle.
You rode your bike four miles to my house. Yelled "I'm so high!" Then crashed into his car. It's a problem.
He started a convo with me by saying that we went to high school together and then recommended I try meth.
I'm going to become fluent in fucking Belgian boys
I just choked eating whip cream from the can, and peed a little because I was coughing so hard. How am I still single.
I wish I just waited long enough to hate someone to fuck one
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