Just saw a midget shotgun a coors light
Goal for tonight: Make one last drunken mistake for the semester.
She was sucking his dick at Seacrets outside bar in front of all of us...her friends kept coming over crying and yelling "Tiffany stop it"
I just saw a girl wearing a flannel shirt that would make 1992 cringe
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Not only did I see you last night, you had me help you meet women by convincing them you were deaf and only I understood your sign language
i broke up with my boyfriend last night because i had to eat a freezy pop in every color and he ate the last blue one. i sat on the floor and cried for an hour at least. everyone left. so i decided that this whole weed thing isnt really healthy for my relationships.
I was pissed last night bc this girl didn't want to have sex but offered to reimburse me for the condoms. That just made me upset
Btw kudos to your tongue last night. Sorry about that lady jizz in your beard.
Please tell me you aren't concussed from dancing on the stripper pole
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Guess who just sucked off 1/5 of one direction?
body shots are frowned upon at family weddings. i'll keep that in mind next time. maybe.
Life is when you're laying naked in bed, eating Double Stuff Oreos with your boyfriend, blazed as fuck. Happy 4/20.
I might run out into oncoming traffic. Id rather break my legs and/or die then continue with today.
She broke up with me after I spent the whole day speaking in nothing but Marshawn Lynch quotes.
I just had 3 numbers I don't know text me and remind me I am to attend AA on monday. Im gonna say it was a good night.
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