She looked like her face caught fire, and someone put it out with a screwdriver.
No, I don't think Michelle is a squirter. And if I've had anal sex, the Obamas have.
currently walking past a fire hyrdrant with a hose already attatched.. this could be dangerous..
that knocking you heard last night......that was her head slowly going through the wall
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He kept telling me how extraordinarily clean my ears were.
when we got back we had sex. but it wasnt til the morning that i figured out her leg was broken
That's why you NEVER put anything a stripper gave you in your mouth
You're mold. I may or maynot have puked blood this morning.
I spent 10 minutes contemplating condensation on grapes this morning.
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Then we woke up and they shouted "Emergency Vodka!!" and that's how we got redrunk.
So what's your itinerary for Amsterdam?
Show up, get drunk, get laid, try not to miss my flight home.
I'm in jersey with marbles.. He's blasted about to fuck a manatee and his entire family is trying to stop it. His mother punched me in the chest for not trying hard enough
I woke up this morning and had to retrieve my clothes from the flagpole, they were using my boxers as a makeshift rally flag for drinking. Yeah last night was a success.
Wow dude wow that's sad man so sad. I dno't event wanna massturbate anymore due to teh sadness
I call bullshit
Call it what ever you want I just need to figure out how to get permanent marker off my cock
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