She said so on her MySpace, so it's gotta be true.
so she asked me if I thought she was fat and naturally I said no..... but I think she might catch on
who is she? I really hope you have an explanation cause either you think I'm fat or you're cheating on me
i've decided that sluts are like cars. they may look good as hell on the outside, but you never know what kind of shit is hiding under the hood.
We agreed to not shave eyebrows when someone is passed out. douchebag.
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I just figured out that you can toast a marshmallow with a butter knife and a cigarette lighter. I'm like a retarded Mister Wizard
Your one and only job is to make sure I am on that bus tomorrow morning with no cat makeup on my face
Did a bunch of gravity bongs and am watched hours of Frozen Planet. There is nothing in the world I want more than to hug a polar bear.
I just explained it as we hate everyone in the world more then we hate each other. Thus making us friends. Plus we drink...a lot
I think drinking is the foundation of our friendship
You will never truly trust yourself until you have shaved your armpits, legs, and vagina in the dark.
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how do you expect me to pass the time when I'm too old to be jailbait but too young to legally drink
I'm sitting on my couch eating a bag of marshmallows and watching someone run bare ass down the street. What has happened to my life?
My life is a clusterfuck of men and disorderly priorities right meow.
I was just going for a one night stand and now I'm at breakfast with his entire family.
I'm somewhere between crying and wanting to orgasm.
I'm gonna cum garlic butter
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