My mom just told me that the key to a successful marriage is never seeing your partner take a shit.
Dude. Creed is coming in september.
We're no longer friends.
take it from a girl who woke up with a girl in her bed... you were not that drunk.
I'll tell you what, we couldn't have asked for better binge-drinking weather.
Sometimes I wonder why.. Then I realize I can't fool myself with that question bc we all know it's bc of his enormous dick
In the hospital waiting to be tested for the first uti of the school year....I'm BACK BTICHES.
I feel like tequila heightens the sense of my nipples.
Duuuude - Drag Queen Bingo wasn't supposed to end like thissss
I went out as a member of the house of Gryfindor and came home as Snooki
Dude. I realize why I got sick. 8 shots three beers in an hour. Plus I ate an expired lunchable earlier.
Im rolling face in a pizzeria. I want to be with people who love me.
He made me put my cow print vest and my cowboy hat from my ' sheriff woody' costume and said I'll show you a woody. What I charmer huh!? I love make up sex
He said we were over, wrote my name on the condom he left in my car last night and said he'd always keep it in case I came back. It was kind of romantic
i also remember watching someone vomit off a balcony which was kind of grim
i realized my signature handshake has now become a hookup. i love what college has done to me.
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