I glued a penny on the door Tricia believes its Patrick Swayze haunting our apartment. Fuckin potheads.
I may or may not be drunk driving a golf cart. Vegaaaassssssss.
I have no idea what i drank..i remember dancing and ass grabbing..u falling. Headbutts. Trying not to puke. And deja vu.
is it customary for a bride to wear white even if she's a whore? i feel tie-dye would have been more accurate
We can't have sex anymore. The amount of money I've spent on meds and copays for UTIs is getting ridiculous
Thats the last thing I remember and then I woke up in this Dutch kids dorm and he was taking a picture of me while I was sleeping
How is it possible that i have sex with a guy and he makes YOU breakfast
I definitely recall eating shredded cheese out of the bag while you were wearing that apron.
come on down! you are the next contestant on the night is drunk!
Well we're gonna drink when we get home and I just invited the cab driver to play beer pong
not much sitting here stoned eating my little sisters halloween candy and judging each individual hersheys candy bar and after much deliberation by the selection committee the original hersheys chocolate bar won
He's drinking on a hospital bracelet, the fuck's your excuse?
Just ate an entire BBQ chicken pizza this better go to my tits
I just drank beer out of an old Vicodin bottle hoping to catch some residue. That's how finals week is going
Drunk me started making nachos apparently but never got to the part with the cheese. There are chips everywhere
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