he urdandictionary'ed 'tease' on his phone and made me read through all the definitions. Am i really that bad?
You slept in the bed with him... with your top off.... and just made out with him....
drunk...on the white house tour...security is staring. this will not end well.
you told grandpa to call you daddy
I got the number from the girl at uhaul even after she saw me throw up all over the parking lot with a 6 pack in my hands.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I got a dollar bill stuffed into my bra on two separate occasions by two separate guys simply for having boobs. I feel like somewhere god is patting himself on te back while pointing at me goin "you're welcome dude." easiest two bucks I ever made.
She just shoved like three McNuggets in her mouth and started sobbing and I have no idea what's going on.
I'm just trying my hardest not to get addicted to drugs or pregnant and all your other friends are out there getting married
...and as she's going down on me I look at the speedo and I'm doing 15 under, with 6 cars tailgating me, and I know her parents saw her head pop up because they were the car right behind us.
It's no shave November. This is our time.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I hid a TracFone in her bra. We'll find her tomorrow.
I slid a quarter down a drunk man's butt crack last night. Qdoba gets rowdy
He said that he had extra crunchy taquitos and wanted to go down on me.. I mean how could I say no?
Apparently 'ewww' is not the correct response to him saying he has to go to a funeral while I'm there.
Idk I saw a cheetah print onesie and it reminded me of your Lion King fantasy.
I asked what it takes to be a good delivery driver, my new boss said "always keep these in your vehicle" as he handed me a flashlight and a blunt. I'm going to like this job.
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