I just jerked it to the same porn two nights in a row... and she says I have problems with commitment...
Only in Alabama do they play hymns in a bar!!!
Please dont use Danity Kane lyrics to describe your emotions.
Enough with studying for finals. Time to put that my little pony coloring book to use.
You look just like Jennifer Aniston on food.
I found those 18 whoppers we bought.
After he told me that it's up to him to carry on his family name, I almost felt bad for not letting him cum inside me.
How does "I'm not drinking tonight" turn into body shots?
Between the walk of shame, bar fight, karaoke, injuries, number of bar check-ins, and variety/quantity of alcohols and Advil consumed, I'd say HookerFest 2012 was a raging success.
Just remember, if we get caught, you're deaf and I don't speak English.
I think I should start a match.com profile and put "robe lounging" as my only hobby
Both of our knuckles were split open this morning when I came out of the blackout, the column on the porch has two new cracks in it, were like the redneck Super Smash Bros.
I want to buy weed from this guy on Tinder but I'm not sure I should trust him...but it's free delivery
I think I fell asleep on my pizza last night. Damn, I am sauccccy.
I want to shoot him sideways (so he can still breathe) in the Adam's apple with my little crossbow.
Randomize
