I just walked by a ginger with a mullet. I repeat GINGER mullet. So help us God.
let's just say, the carpet matched the drapes. in colour and length.
I'm going to take the bottles back.. And maybe get an x-ray
we could easily be the first people to smoke 3 bowls and pound a Four Loco before goin on a tour of the Tillamook cheese factory
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You could give me a blowjob later? :)
I meant do something romantic..
Blowjob In the moonlight?
I made two strippers play rock paper scissors to see who would give me a lap dance last night
I figured that I'd start organizing the places ive given head. I'll add treehouse right after bandroom
oh and i'm sorry i sold you for three cigarettes last night
Note to self: Do not bring gift bag with cock ring inside to family Christmas. Leave to unwrap at home.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
How do I know I'm high? Let me count the ways.
1. I put the milk in the cupboard, 2. Everything tastes fucking amazing, 3. My dog is really soft, 4. The lunesta butterfly flew out of my tv and touched me
Want to come over and rub aloe on my tits?
The problem is that you are trying to hold on to some dignity. Let it go. I hope your rash gets better.
I'm in Florida in a retirement community the fuck am I supposed to do but watch tv and disgrace Jesus
Are you feeling better yet?
I need a nap and a new butthole
Had to claim I'd "gone lesbian" to get my cat back. Thank God I got away from that one.
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