hide the guitars, Nate just learned to play free fallin'
I just walked by a ginger with a mullet. I repeat GINGER mullet. So help us God.
White Russians with skim milk. Fuck I'm healthy.
needless to say, I hope she has to get an abortion again
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i drank out of a bidet.
I'm considering failing out of my last semester of college just so I can keep fucking him.
I'm just planning on experiencing Disney as adult style as it gets. Drinking bloody mary's at dawn and telling all the kids waiting in lines how badly their future sucks and that Santa isn't real.
She fell down no less than 4 times while we were at the club. One of which was while she was in the bathroom stall next to me.
I'm having one of my monday morning walk of shame coffees if you care to join.
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Was she always missing a tooth or am I just now noticing it?
I think i'm going to homewreck at this Disney on Ice show.
Well, I guess that's how life goes for my dad. One minute you're walking with your cooler on the afterglow of a Lynyrd Skynyrd concert, the next you find your grown son choking out a drunk redneck against your pickup truck.
You don't know how skeptical I was about letting a guy with braces go down on me
I feel like you can't break up with someone on 420. It's against stoner code
You added his wife on Facebook?! You're horrible at this mistress thing