Well you know what I always say about freshmen.... If you want it, and they've got it... get it.
i don't know what kind of porn he watches.. but that is NOT how you do it...
When you told me you were coming to my show, I didn't know you were bringing Satan and Brokeback Mountain with you.
Is it weird that I think of Ennis from Brokeback Mountain everytime I hear "Make em Say" by Master P? "I don't need your money. Huh." NA NA NA NAAA.
She told me a very interesting story, complete with pantomimes, about how she got a habanero seed in her vag
My therapist said that she thinks i may have a sex addiction. I think she may be a terrible therapist.
Want me to drive you to Dr. Drew's sex rehab?
Nah, cause then i cant masturbate to that show anymore.
I think I should become a real estate agent in th friend zone I know the place so well
when we got back we had sex. but it wasnt til the morning that i figured out her leg was broken
Omg! I'm gonna have a heat stroke. I'm going to collect my sweat and drink it for a buzz and hydration purposes
Because her vagina is one of those illusive black holes that leads to a parallel universe where he is king and the sea is made of beer! That is why they are together!
And I just want to be like your tongue is not a FUCKING sword
And then he serenaded me with "Pimps don't cry" from 'The Other Guys'. If that's not love I'm not sure what is
Yknow what, if there is a thug life for white bitches, I'm living it. I went out on a date, watched howls moving castle with my brother till he passed out, then went and got some a+ dick, and made it home in time to take my mom to work. Now its 7am, I'm in bed with some free tacos, and when I'm done eating I'm going to sleep. What a great night.
her fuck buddy was butt ass naked in our kitchen making waffles but they tasted so bomb
Lunch?
Massage?
Spanking with handcuffs?
Randomize
