what do you think about when you wanna get rid of a boner?
dying kittens.
thats the last time I fuck a piece of fruit on camera for him.
We may have a problem that even dr. phil cant solve
I skipped class, don't know why though bc all I did in the meantime was cook pancakes and watch infomercials..my life sucks
i googled waterboarding like you asked. as long as you do it outside. we have carpet. but i wont be a part of it.
the theme of the baby shower is Nightmare On Prego Street
I feel wrong giving my mom a cash gift full of dirty stripper money.
his mom gave me my lost underwear folded up along with the rest of my christmas present. tell me this cannot be happening.
I'm driving up the street and can't tell if my ears are actually about to pop or not.
A solid 8.5 on the baked meter, I need to stop.
Can we table this discussion? The roommate is out of town and I have to eat pie on the couch in my underwear.
DUDE. HOLY FUCK MY PRINCIPAL WAS JUST MY UBER DRIVER. I AM LITERALLY TRAUMATIZED. ANS DRUNK. HOLY FUCK OMG
Things that don't wash off in the shower: black eyes and hickies.
I can't believe you tried to cock block me from A DIFFERENT TIME ZONE.
i think we reached that point in our drunkenness where even the creeps found us intolerable
These freshmen are fun! The redhead wants to practice her blowjob skills with me and let me rate different moves!
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