Its not drinking alone if you got Tiger on the Wii.
the star wars geek is hitting on me, and is talking about his lightsaber. need back up NOW
I just realized that the music from spongebob is also used in real sex HBO.
Let's just be mature adults about last night and never speak of it again.
I woke up to 30 angry texts and her Chihuahua in my room. Can you drop him off for me?
What's your middle initial? I need it for the census. I put us down as "unmarried partners."
Oh my god... you're gay. Ps, its A.
No no. According to the 2010 US Census, we're gay.
After the tests come back negative, you guys will look back on this evening with fond memories...
she definitely blew him on the riverbank, some lady floated past and said "have some pride honey", amazingly awkward
he's drinking at 8 in the morning. it's going to be one of those "or else the terrorists have won" kinda days
So if you ever need to know a guy who knows a guy who knows a guy that can put a 24oz beer can up his ass... Hit me up...
As I type I'm climbing my cousins swingset so I can take a nap inside the slide. Fuck this hangover. I always win.
I just made SCOTCHSICLES. no further info is necessary
You told the cop you where the star of the Track team and tried to run away. So yeah, i'm not surprised.
I just bought emergency deodorant at Dominick's and put it on in front of a homeless man while waiting for the bus. He laughed and said 'girl, you a mess'. This is my life.
My sex life is driven by spite and alcohol