her vagine was all disorganized.
he had two deer mounted on his dorm room wall with panties and bras hanging from the antlers... i cant believe i contributed to bambi's headgear...
could you please tell me why you thought vodka soaked band aids were a good idea?
You're a disgrace to the female race and the love triangle and halloween.
I mean it was like cry my eyes out or masturbate in my moms bathroom.
don't you dare blame getting arrested on me. you sugested we play the penis game and we all know I'm a strong competitor
Making a me burrito to ward off the cold...and the aloneness of my vagina
No joke, I just found $85 on the ground. Must be because I bought you all that liquor. So much good karma.
Then that is decided. Fuck away my little bunny rabbit.
I never thought I would be saying these words but...when did David Spade get hot?
Just bought condoms with a walmart gift card. Thanks grandma.
I just spent the last three days trying to hook up with a dude for his pool privileges
Left my house last night with a girlfriend, $200 in my wallet, and 10 finger nails. Came home with no girlfriend, an empty wallet, and 9 1/2 finger nails.
Yea, I had a bad night too aha
Why do I always have at least 8 men with whom I am conducting some sort of poorly planned love experiment?
idk he wanted to trade sex for a triple order of hashbrowns
AND YOU SAID NO?????????
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