Goodnight sugar queer
Sugar queer??
Why does my predictive text prioritize 'queer' over 'puffs'?
She kept chasing him yelling thief, because he drank some of her drink. That was at 8, it got worse.
Next time we throw a party together I would appreciate it if you didn't try to get my friends to hook up with friends of yours you know have herpes
I'm chugging Gatorade because i drank something called a trashcan and someone named Gianna diamond has my credit card number, and I think I might have ruined my life.
So the old dude that tried to fight me is definitely Katie's dad. And the pot cookie's kicking in. Shit is getting weird.
Do you ever feel like your dog agrees with you? Like REALLY really agrees.
True enough. Do you ever think that these girls grandparents ghosts are watching you masterbate to their granddaughters and look at you in Shame?
Wanna show up on a guy's doorstep and punch him in the balls for me? At least this one isn't a cop.
You knocked on your freshman year room door, told the kids who opened it "I own you", and attempted to force-feed them everclear.
Never drinking before a 6am train again. Just threw up at boarder control and had to pretend it was cause I was pregnant and not cause I trashed.
You make Europe seem so glamorous.
I'll seduce him with my charm, after all, I am a graceful swan.
More like a demented cow.
I wear drunk well.
he offered to let me fuck his brother , of course im marrying him
Fuck the system, do you have any medieval weapons?
Nothing ruins your day more than waking up to you dogs crotch in your face
Randomize
