he was chasing shots of soco with fistfuls of my birthday cake
Another weekend, another 3 guys I have to awkwardly avoid while crossing campus...
Just saw a denim jacket with the phrase christian cowboy...ridin with the lord under a picture of a cowboy in a sunset. I'm def in mississippi.
Every time I hit my bowl my neighbors set off fireworks... I stop, they stop. I start again, they start again. Too high for this.
I don't even want to think what you did to boys being that drunk and horny.
Then I wouldn't suggest looking at the pictures from last night.
Yeah I'm gunna date him. I figure its regular sex and maybe feelings will come in time...it worked for arranged marriages...
Well regardless of where or with who you will be blacking out and i will be pouring shots down ur throat like a baby bird
She only spoke Russian, but she was so gorgeous it didn't matter
Oh. I think she ate all the cake and took our vodka...still gorgeous.
Clearly my hormones are sending beaming lights to every penis in the area
whatever the appropriate amount of shots is to consider drunken acrobatics a good idea was a few less than I actually had
I only see on penis in this picture but I assume there is another lurking out of sight.
You came out of your room naked under your open robe with a mouth full of brownie on a stick and grabbed a fistful of fruit loops and shoved them into your already full mouth.
gonna guess the empty vodka bottle and open can of tuna in the bathroom drawer are related?
I think the sex rug burn on my back is infected, can you check it out when you get home?
I still hate everything and everyone around me. Krampus taught me nothing.
Randomize
