He quoted an N'sync song to confess his attraction to me. Needless to say, I had sex with him.
Thats a flattering suggestion doug but lets be clear NO you may not put your face in my vagina just because ur not charging me a cover. sorry.
got some bad news about ur virginity. she didnt make it thru the night
why is it whenever you puke in the park there are always little kids on the swings?
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Wow. 8.8 earthquake hit Chile this morning
didn't feel it. :)
It's like 5 thousand miles away of course you didn't.
wait what? so it's not in america?
He came in, laid on our floor and started to make a snow angel.. On the floor. Then he just left never said a word. 20 mins later walked back in and dropped his pants, looked down and said "wow im happy i had boxers on."
seriously though jaeger and i are fucking done professionally
future-me showed up mid trip and gave us a thumbs up.
I have a cat, a bottle of wine, and a Brazilian man. I need to catch you up on my life
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There's a picture of you on facebook laying in the street with 3 cops standing over you after you faceplanted off that guy's shoulders.
Is that what happened to my face?!
Come to the roof. We are drinking breakfast.
The only joy I have here is being able to shit with the door open.
Jesus when did you leave my house? I found 2 bottles of wine, vodka, and a book with blow all over it wondering if I was read bedtime stories
Dude I turned down free booze. I think I'm growing as a person.
Dude just walked up to me, gave me his number and said, if this number ever calls its my penis,better keep that one handy. I cant lie its the best pick up line ever, im calling his penis.
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