wait, do i give off the impression that i DON'T want girls to show me their boobs if i video chat with them?
No, I'm only going to drink half my paycheck. That's the responsible thing to do.
He kept starring at my ass and repeating "Its Just a beautiful piece of artwork."
This guy in church just had a prayer request to help him get through his hangover. He is my new hero.
I mean we've tried to get high on nutmeg, we clearly dont know the definition of "too far"
we decided to do a scavenge hunt for ourself for when we walked back to our apartments. We hid taco bell behind some bushes. I think they are still good.
saying that you may be able to suck the gay out of me was just my way of getting a blowjob...thank you for the valiant effort.
LISTEN TO ME! GAY. FIREFIGHTER. They are the most rare and precious kind of gay. The kind little gays dream of. It needs to happen.
I just literally had a dance party in my closet. I've never been this blazed.
Not sure. He doesn't know where New York is on a map but he gives an incredible spanking.
Who cares about New York?
What part of don't open in front of your kids didn't you understand? Astroglide, magnums, fuzzy handcuffs and a blindfold are going to be hard to explain as friends presents.
Reading becomes significantly more difficult when people are having crazy loud sex in an adjoining room
the universe is starting to freak me out.. ive now had sex with 3 people who were born on the same day..
I wasn’t trying, but work got a lot easier and more fun once he starred flirting with me and looking at my ass
I love Texas men! TSA agent found my vibrator, nodded approvingly, and said, “You have a nice night, ma’am” with a cowboy accent. I almost made out with him on the spot
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